...

Do you ever get that feeling that if something doesn't change everything around you is going to simply implode? Every move you make is like tip toeing across a thin glass ceiling, and every word you even think of uttering is thoroughly thought out and rehearsed. I know I'm not the only one who feels like that sometimes.

I guess the only thing to do then is get away.

Winter Wonderland

It's been beautiful outside lately. Has anyone else noticed that? The air has been crisp, the clouds have been rich, and the sunsets and rises have been intense. Even the moonlight has been able to cast dramatic shadows lately.

Maybe it's all in the beholder, but there seems to be an energy in the air lately...

Event Horizon

A spatial boundary around a black hole inside which gravity is strong enough to prevent all matter and radiation from escaping. The inability of even light to escape this region is what gives black holes their name.


The point of no return.

Everyone's is different, that event that changes you. That point where there is no going back because the person before ceased to exist. 


"If you had crossed it, that event horizon, how would you know?"
"Because... you would be ripped apart, molecule by molecule..."

This Side Up

Life seems fragile right now.
We should all treat each other with care while we ring in 2010.
This year's been rough.

Turn Around, We're Back On Eachother

The more I let out, the more I need to.

What's left?

You're Already The Voice Inside My Head

Today's the last day before Winter break...
This first semester can't be summed up in a word, or even in a list of words. My feels are in constant motion, revolving around both good and bad emotions. There were more tears and cold sweat than I anticipated. Less all-night art binges than I was expecting (thankfully). And more laughter than probably necessary, at times.

I wonder what this new set of classes will unleash.

Brrr

This cold weather seems to have everyone freaking out. But I sort of enjoy the frigid temperature. I don't know if it is the fact that it is too cold to space out or the all the ice crystals in the air making it easier to see, but everything seems crisper. The water looks cleaner, the trees (that kept their leaves) twinkle in the sunlight since it never gets above freezing. Sunrises and sunsets are breathtaking with the pinks and oranges. And the mountains resemble cliched Pacific Northwest postcards.  

Design Elements

LINE

     P

   ATT

  ERNS..

PERSPECTIVE

G#0M#TRY

Fuck

You know that feeling you get when you know you're being self destructive? You're avoiding something hard and you know putting it off is just going to make it worse... yet you still let the time pass by. Or when you keep trying the same thing over and over again even though you know you're going to get the same result again and again.

We all do that at some time in our life, in some way.

One would think once you stopped lying to yourself and you realized you were just being self destructive, you would be able to stop.

Maybe my brain is just over thinking and hyper aware because of all this Nietzsche and Krishnamurti bullshit... I'm glad it's almost over. Maybe that's why I've been the super bitch of the century.

Right... Here's a picture

This is what I do like about my school.

Home

I love Seattle. I think everyone who knows me in any way at any level knows that about me. I love the art you can find haphazardly stuck to any and all touchable surfaces. I love the adorable enthusiasm of almost everyone you meet. I even have a soft spot for the sporadic and nonsensical one way streets that make up this hilly city. 
Pike's Place may be a huge tourist attraction... but it's for the locals at heart. The majority of the gum on the brick wall in the alley are from Seattle mouths, we know exactly when to get our doughnuts so we don't have to stand in that line that winds practically down the stairs. We know when to avoid the overlook park because the sad genocide people are protesting. The fish smell barely registers as we easily navigate through the holiday standing-room-only crowds.
And we know which performers are worth the pause, and which sellers can entertain just as well.

 Whitney Mongé

Sorry Krishnamurti,

But life is meaningless without goals. Whether you believe life is circular and constantly revolving, or that it is linear with one foot in front of the other, you are still in motion. You are still moving toward something. Either you picked where you're going, or you've left the future up to fate. But there is always something next.
Goals keep us going, they keep our attention and effort. Small, daily, unimportant, or life-altering, all-consuming, and imperative, everyone has different goals for their life. Creativity is in the attainment of those goals. Not letting anyone raise question or ridicule, distract or dissuade you.

My goal?
Stay close to the love of my life. Constantly observe and document all that I see and add to the beauty I encounter there.

No Visual Aide

Everyone is unfinished. That means we all have flaws; some deep and unmistakable, while others can be subtle and easy to glance over. Our flaws in some ways define us. They conquer us everyday. Fear, dishonesty, prejudice, pride, resentment, regret...  The only way to push forward through those paralyzing feelings is to let them go.
Tell someone everything you're scared of. Tell them the truth. Let their advise and opinion in without shutting down, without guarding yourself. They aren't trying to see you fail,  let them hear about all your sorrows and then you can let it go.
It took me a long time to realize that by telling another person all the hurt you hold inside it doesn't simply transfer into them. By putting words to your feelings you're releasing them between you. You're letting that person experience a little of what you went through, what you keep hidden from those you don't trust. And it helps. Laughter helps, smiles help, asking for help... helps.    

Wish You Would Step Out From That Ledge, My Friend

Self worth. It's a hard concept to fully grasp. A lot of people are more than lacking in the self worth department these days. I found myself saying almost just that to someone today, and I'm right, but it takes one to know one. When you have low self esteem you hear all those comments that others let slip by without a thought. You recognize tones in their voices and the rosy blush of their abashed cheeks. Everyone feels self conscious now and again, but some people are stuck in it. Some people have been hurt, humiliated, lied to, lead on, trapped, tortured, abused, or they are just all alone.

 But no one is really alone. We're all just a bunch of moving cells. They have to work together inside of us for us to function, let that be a metaphor for life. Be there for each other, because it's sometimes those that feel unworthy that just need to be shown their worth for them to blossom.